The Urinal

— David Eisbach

Most urinals are porcelain resembling
A decorative wall fountain.
The bottom comes out from the wall
A few feet off the floor.
Some have a baked in fly to improve the aim.
Some don’t even use water.
Most countries place them for small boys and men.
One country, I visited, catered to giants,
A problem depending on one’s extension.
For some older boys, there is a perfect storm brewing.
Most public restrooms have tiled floors.
Cleaning leaves a thin, slippery film on the surface.
To get close, one straddles the urinal with legs spread.
Unlike the aging shrinking man,
The prostate grows and constricts urine flow.
Picture a man positioned over the urinal
With his feet slowly spreading outward.
Unable to stop or speed up,
A look of resignation comes over his face
As he gallantly prepares to go down with the ship!

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